oh LORD

Oh LORD,
What are you doing with all of this? What am I expected to learn from this pain? Am I doing O.K....at least for today anyway? Some days the pain is just so raw, and other days painfully far away. I am not sure which feels worse though, and I wonder if I am trusting you and your promise to prosper me. Do I even really know what it means to trust you? Will I one day be like Job or Paul even? Will I ever be strong and wise and close to you like they learned to be? Will others one day tell my story long after I am gone, and tell of my love and devotion to you even through the worst of times? Will I be able to be such a person that can even thank you for this trial? Am I really being refined? I don't feel refined just burned. Please remind me that one day....one day...one day...I don't even know what, just remind me LORD. Remind me how important I am to you. Remind me that you are still in control. You know me better than I do, Remind me LORD..remind me.

I do love you, you know,
Samara